Having been typing more or less continuously since the beginning of term now, instead of breaking it up with teaching, I have developed a severe case of RSI from cocking my little finger as I four finger type. Either I need to alter the way I hold my fingers, or I am not going to be able to face sitting down at this keyboard for another stint next week.
I can't even hold a pen properly any more.
Oh well. At least it's Friday.
Friday, 30 September 2011
Day 19 - Actual Teaching is Exhausting
A member of my English department was at a meeting all day today, so I got to be her. I got to be an English teacher!
It's funny, but looking in on this profession while still a member of it shows me exactly how relentlessly tiring it really is, and how much of it is pupil behaviour management, not actual teaching. I had 3 scehduled lessons before lunch and one after (Year 12 do not come to lessons if their teacher is away) and for every class, I had to explain what I was actually doing in school these days. The pupils know me as an English teacher and now they are confused about my role, and consequently, they believe they do not have to behave in my presence. They are wrong.
I reminded them about good manners, asked them to avoid calling out, calling across the room, throwing things at each other, playing on their phones, playing on someone else's phone, drawing on tables, swinging dangerously on chairs, hitting each other with rulers; it was endless.
And it was exhausting. They were exhausting. I'm exhausted writing this now, just thinking about it. My head aches, my hands ache, my eyes ache. Even my eyelashes ache. I haven't taught a full day since July.
The same teacher is away at another meeting on Monday so I have to do it all over again. Best get some sleep in this weekend then.
It's funny, but looking in on this profession while still a member of it shows me exactly how relentlessly tiring it really is, and how much of it is pupil behaviour management, not actual teaching. I had 3 scehduled lessons before lunch and one after (Year 12 do not come to lessons if their teacher is away) and for every class, I had to explain what I was actually doing in school these days. The pupils know me as an English teacher and now they are confused about my role, and consequently, they believe they do not have to behave in my presence. They are wrong.
I reminded them about good manners, asked them to avoid calling out, calling across the room, throwing things at each other, playing on their phones, playing on someone else's phone, drawing on tables, swinging dangerously on chairs, hitting each other with rulers; it was endless.
And it was exhausting. They were exhausting. I'm exhausted writing this now, just thinking about it. My head aches, my hands ache, my eyes ache. Even my eyelashes ache. I haven't taught a full day since July.
The same teacher is away at another meeting on Monday so I have to do it all over again. Best get some sleep in this weekend then.
Wednesday, 28 September 2011
Day 18 - Meerkats, Gorillas and a steaming bus
I was asked to accompany a Year 10 group of ICT students to Bristol Zoo today; last year's Year 9 - not the most pleasant of year groups to be honest, and therefore not the most enticing of prospects, but I agreed to go, despite my ambivalence about zoos and Year 10 in general. School trips do not thrill me at the best of times, particularly given the vast amounts of beaurocracy that accompanies them, but the thought that I would not be responsible for the overall administration of this trip and the fact that it was a relatively short one (leaving at 9, back by 3 in time for the last buzzer) informed my final decision.
We got on a bus. We set off. We arrived. We looked at sad creatures in small enclosures. We got hot. We got back on a bus. We travelled back, getting hotter and hotter with the freakish September weather that has descended upon Wales this week. We arrived back at school in time for the last buzzer. Nothing untoward happened. Paperwork was completed. No children were lost or fell into an enclosure. Everything went well.
Now I'm supervising a detention with a young man who needs to learn some manners. Apparently, his parents are very disppointed that he has an after school detention. So am I. It's nice outside. I should be in my garden with a mojito, enjoying this freakish September weather.
We got on a bus. We set off. We arrived. We looked at sad creatures in small enclosures. We got hot. We got back on a bus. We travelled back, getting hotter and hotter with the freakish September weather that has descended upon Wales this week. We arrived back at school in time for the last buzzer. Nothing untoward happened. Paperwork was completed. No children were lost or fell into an enclosure. Everything went well.
Now I'm supervising a detention with a young man who needs to learn some manners. Apparently, his parents are very disppointed that he has an after school detention. So am I. It's nice outside. I should be in my garden with a mojito, enjoying this freakish September weather.
Friday, 23 September 2011
Day 14 - Fire Drill!
It took my only scheduled class of the week 17 minutes to arrive from PE for my PSE lesson, 23 minutes to settle down, take off their coats, stop whingeing about how hot the room was, sit in the seats in which I had asked them to sit, finish arguments in involving the insult "Pikey" and to stop hitting each other, 11 minutes to take from their portfolios the work they were going to do.....
And then the fire alarm went off.
Lesson over. Let's see if I can actually get them working next week.
And then the fire alarm went off.
Lesson over. Let's see if I can actually get them working next week.
Wednesday, 21 September 2011
Day 13 - Talking Absolute Nonsense
My main task today was to supervise a group of disaffected pupils extracted from French lessons so that they can work with a Law Enforcement officer. A teacher, by law, has to be in with the group. So, I sat there in an official capacity, but wasn't required to particiapte or intervene.
The utter nonsense that came from these children was completely dispiriting. When they weren't bad-mouthing my colleagues, they were regaling Urban Myths and wittering on about so and so in Year 9 who's pregnant and, horror of horrors, going to keep the baby! "Oh my God if that was me, I'd be so embarrassed! My dad would stab me in the head!"
They spent an hour talking all over each other, yelling at each other even though not one of them was more than 6 inches away from another, they talked all over the group Facilitator and were thoroughly unpleasant throughout. Just listening to them was hard work.
I think maybe tomorrow, the group leader would be well served by laying down some group work ground rules before even attempting to achieve what she wants to achieve - maybe that way, I won't have to listen to a lot of ill-informed, self-satisfied, mindless drivel while I'm checking my emails (a task I resorted to as I couldn't concentrate on the Literacy work I had to do). I certainly can't do any serious work with that racket going on.
Alternatively, I could bring my earplugs into school...
The utter nonsense that came from these children was completely dispiriting. When they weren't bad-mouthing my colleagues, they were regaling Urban Myths and wittering on about so and so in Year 9 who's pregnant and, horror of horrors, going to keep the baby! "Oh my God if that was me, I'd be so embarrassed! My dad would stab me in the head!"
They spent an hour talking all over each other, yelling at each other even though not one of them was more than 6 inches away from another, they talked all over the group Facilitator and were thoroughly unpleasant throughout. Just listening to them was hard work.
I think maybe tomorrow, the group leader would be well served by laying down some group work ground rules before even attempting to achieve what she wants to achieve - maybe that way, I won't have to listen to a lot of ill-informed, self-satisfied, mindless drivel while I'm checking my emails (a task I resorted to as I couldn't concentrate on the Literacy work I had to do). I certainly can't do any serious work with that racket going on.
Alternatively, I could bring my earplugs into school...
Day 12 - Qualify or bust
I have to get two Year 11 pupils through an Essential Skills Wales Communication qualification, now that they have no curriculum provision on a Tuesday since the demise of their College course. I will take them through this qualification during Lessons 4 and 5 on a Tuesday. Guess who didn't turn up Lessons 4 and 5 this Tuesday. That's right.
But they have to get this qualification or it will upset the balance of outcomes and bugger up the school stats....
Never mind they should have to get this qualification because it will benefit them, not the school's blinging statistics.
Although, if we're honest, what real use is a Level 1 Essential Skills Wales certificate in Communication? Oh, I'm terribly cynical today!
But they have to get this qualification or it will upset the balance of outcomes and bugger up the school stats....
Never mind they should have to get this qualification because it will benefit them, not the school's blinging statistics.
Although, if we're honest, what real use is a Level 1 Essential Skills Wales certificate in Communication? Oh, I'm terribly cynical today!
Monday, 19 September 2011
Day 11 - Form 3 Physics Flashback
My mission today was to produce some literacy materials for Maths. I was determined that I would not let personal fear get in the way of fulfilling my orders, so I asked the Head of Maths for some direction. She furnished me with several chunks of text which I would be able to use to generate Maths-specific reading tasks. The first one I tackled posed a real problem for me: Colour mixing. Everybody knows that red and blue make purple, and that red and yellow make orange - but that's elementary paint mixing. When it comes to mixing light, well, that's Physics, surely? And when you add in the fact that suddenly, light has divisions called magenta and cyan, well, I have to admit, I did spend rather a lot of time trying to figure out that magenta is reddish purple (easy!) and cyan is....what colour is that, exactly?
Then there was a lot of incomprehensible stuff about an apple reflecting green light, and absorbing red and blue light. Absorbing red and blue? Where? Under its skin? And how does the apple know that it has to reflect green light? Is the skin not green to begin with? And then, I'm afraid, I'm into Philosophy, which is perfectly useless when I'm trying to figure out how to put light equations into a simple table for Literacy purposes.
I'm supposed to be reasonably intelligent - but I still can't work out which light you take away to leave the colour you need reflected. So, the question is, if I can't understand the simplest of Mathematics/Physics, then what chance have the pupils for whom these resources are created?
Then there was a lot of incomprehensible stuff about an apple reflecting green light, and absorbing red and blue light. Absorbing red and blue? Where? Under its skin? And how does the apple know that it has to reflect green light? Is the skin not green to begin with? And then, I'm afraid, I'm into Philosophy, which is perfectly useless when I'm trying to figure out how to put light equations into a simple table for Literacy purposes.
I'm supposed to be reasonably intelligent - but I still can't work out which light you take away to leave the colour you need reflected. So, the question is, if I can't understand the simplest of Mathematics/Physics, then what chance have the pupils for whom these resources are created?
Day 10 - End of Week 2
This week has gone so quickly. I have to admit, I'm quite enjoying myself. It must be true what they say - a change is as good as a rest. I have floated about school, being useful, helpful, cheerful and purposeful, something I wouldn't have thought possible last week. But today I was a teacher again!
Being a teacher is usually a slog. Every day, it's a slog. I never saw it before, though, and I just accepted it as my lot. So much of it is pure drudgery. Getting through one hour after another with maybe the slightest hope that at the end of that hour, perhaps two or three of the pupils in my care would have made some progress.
But I worked with 5 pupils today. Not exactly one-to-one, but it might as well have been. I was able to devote my time equally to each of them in turn. Quietly. Calmly. Methodically. Instead of having 33 braying teens all clamouring at once for attention, I had 5 little stars who waited patiently for their turn. It makes a difference, you know. Of course it does - and anyone who says otherwise is seriously deluded.
Class sizes do matter. My 5 little stars completed more work today than my former Year 9s could manage in a week. Even though I had to juggle 5 different rates of progress, 5 different levels of ability, 5 different emotional profiles, 5 different styles of learning, I was able to simply because there were only 5 in the class.
I'm looking forward to my next session with them. I might actually make a difference here. Wouldn't that be novel!
Being a teacher is usually a slog. Every day, it's a slog. I never saw it before, though, and I just accepted it as my lot. So much of it is pure drudgery. Getting through one hour after another with maybe the slightest hope that at the end of that hour, perhaps two or three of the pupils in my care would have made some progress.
But I worked with 5 pupils today. Not exactly one-to-one, but it might as well have been. I was able to devote my time equally to each of them in turn. Quietly. Calmly. Methodically. Instead of having 33 braying teens all clamouring at once for attention, I had 5 little stars who waited patiently for their turn. It makes a difference, you know. Of course it does - and anyone who says otherwise is seriously deluded.
Class sizes do matter. My 5 little stars completed more work today than my former Year 9s could manage in a week. Even though I had to juggle 5 different rates of progress, 5 different levels of ability, 5 different emotional profiles, 5 different styles of learning, I was able to simply because there were only 5 in the class.
I'm looking forward to my next session with them. I might actually make a difference here. Wouldn't that be novel!
Thursday, 15 September 2011
Day 9 - Sound, she is, mun!
The highest praise a teacher can overhear about herself is that she's sound.
I had been given a class to teach for the rest of this term, ostensibly so that the class teacher could be released to set up a Therapy Group for Pupils with Low Self Esteem. So, every Thursday, I would be teaching PSE to 7C. Today was my first session with them.
We barely had time to do Introductions before the lesson was over, but during the session, we established that I'm a big fan of Good Manners, that if you use Good Manners all the time, there is no way you can ever get into trouble, that at least 7 of the boys were confused by my Classroom Personality and spent the whole lesson working out ways of trying to challenge my authority, and that there are 5 City fans in the room, myself included.
"Where do you sit down the ground, then?" demanded Scott, challengingly, as if he'd catch me out if I didn't know the areas of the ground. He was one of the ones who was trying to work out how to undermine me and take the class.
"Near the tunnel," I answered. Scott tried again.
"You know what a Glory Hunter is?"
"Yes."
"You one of them?"
"I've been a City supporter since I was 6," I told the little tyke. "That's 34 years, so don't you go casting aspersions, young fella me laddio!"
"Worrrh! 34 yerze! 'igh five, Miss!" interjected William, who was a member of the English class in which I supported a fellow member of the English Department, and I obliged by high-fiving him. It was, after all, Collecting In Portfolios Time. Scott gave him a look of disgust, but I could see I'd possibly taken William out of Scott's Naughty Gang from that moment on, simply by being a City supporter.
When I had dismissed them, they trundled noisily out of the room. I followed a few moments later to go and get my lunch. Voices floated up to me in the stairwell:
"What have you just had?"
"PSE with Ms B!"
"Orrrrh! She my English teacher, she is!"
"Sound she is, mun!"
As I said, the highest praise a teacher can overhear about herself is that she's sound. I smiled all the way to the fridge.
I had been given a class to teach for the rest of this term, ostensibly so that the class teacher could be released to set up a Therapy Group for Pupils with Low Self Esteem. So, every Thursday, I would be teaching PSE to 7C. Today was my first session with them.
We barely had time to do Introductions before the lesson was over, but during the session, we established that I'm a big fan of Good Manners, that if you use Good Manners all the time, there is no way you can ever get into trouble, that at least 7 of the boys were confused by my Classroom Personality and spent the whole lesson working out ways of trying to challenge my authority, and that there are 5 City fans in the room, myself included.
"Where do you sit down the ground, then?" demanded Scott, challengingly, as if he'd catch me out if I didn't know the areas of the ground. He was one of the ones who was trying to work out how to undermine me and take the class.
"Near the tunnel," I answered. Scott tried again.
"You know what a Glory Hunter is?"
"Yes."
"You one of them?"
"I've been a City supporter since I was 6," I told the little tyke. "That's 34 years, so don't you go casting aspersions, young fella me laddio!"
"Worrrh! 34 yerze! 'igh five, Miss!" interjected William, who was a member of the English class in which I supported a fellow member of the English Department, and I obliged by high-fiving him. It was, after all, Collecting In Portfolios Time. Scott gave him a look of disgust, but I could see I'd possibly taken William out of Scott's Naughty Gang from that moment on, simply by being a City supporter.
When I had dismissed them, they trundled noisily out of the room. I followed a few moments later to go and get my lunch. Voices floated up to me in the stairwell:
"What have you just had?"
"PSE with Ms B!"
"Orrrrh! She my English teacher, she is!"
"Sound she is, mun!"
As I said, the highest praise a teacher can overhear about herself is that she's sound. I smiled all the way to the fridge.
Wednesday, 14 September 2011
Day 8 - Convincing the Masses
Department Meeting at Lunch time
HoD: Would you like to explain to everyone what you're up to, Teacher Without Portfolio?
TwP: Actually, I would. And I actually have a Portfolio now, actually. Actually, I'm working with some Year 9 pupils, I have a PSE lesson on Thursdays and we have two Year 11 pupils who failed their College courses so they're back with us on a Tuesday and I am going to push them through an Essential Skills Wales Communication Level 1 Qualification. I am supporting the 2nd in Department for 5 sessions a week, and I'm also creating Literacy Resources for use across the Curriculum. You can find me up in the Teaching Resouce Room, and if you would like me to produce some resources specifically for you, I can do that too.
HoD: So, not just sitting on your arse drinking tea then?
TwP: No.
KEY
HoD: Would you like to explain to everyone what you're up to, Teacher Without Portfolio?
TwP: Actually, I would. And I actually have a Portfolio now, actually. Actually, I'm working with some Year 9 pupils, I have a PSE lesson on Thursdays and we have two Year 11 pupils who failed their College courses so they're back with us on a Tuesday and I am going to push them through an Essential Skills Wales Communication Level 1 Qualification. I am supporting the 2nd in Department for 5 sessions a week, and I'm also creating Literacy Resources for use across the Curriculum. You can find me up in the Teaching Resouce Room, and if you would like me to produce some resources specifically for you, I can do that too.
HoD: So, not just sitting on your arse drinking tea then?
TwP: No.
KEY
TwP - Teacher Without Portfolio
HoD - Head of Department
Tuesday, 13 September 2011
Day 7 - Word Gets Out
Apparently, people seem to be so confused about my role within the confines of this school now that they are beginning to make things up for me to do. So far, these are my jobs:
1. Literacy Support 5 English lessons a week
2. Cover for Absent Teachers
3. Create Resources to Support Literacy Across the Curriculum
4. Work with 2 Year 11 pupils who have failed their Alternative Curriculum Courses and get them through an ESW Communication qualification
5. Teach PSE to a Year 7 class once a week.
That seems to be enough to be getting on with, but the sessions in the classroom are all over the timetable and consequently, my "Creating Resources to Support Literacy Across the Curriculum" time is has now fragmented so that the time I do have is barely adequate to get a good head of steam up.
Still, at least people are now becoming aware that I'm not just sitting with my feet up, drinking tea.
1. Literacy Support 5 English lessons a week
2. Cover for Absent Teachers
3. Create Resources to Support Literacy Across the Curriculum
4. Work with 2 Year 11 pupils who have failed their Alternative Curriculum Courses and get them through an ESW Communication qualification
5. Teach PSE to a Year 7 class once a week.
That seems to be enough to be getting on with, but the sessions in the classroom are all over the timetable and consequently, my "Creating Resources to Support Literacy Across the Curriculum" time is has now fragmented so that the time I do have is barely adequate to get a good head of steam up.
Still, at least people are now becoming aware that I'm not just sitting with my feet up, drinking tea.
Day 6 - Nothing Much Happens
I have been holed up in this room, typing furiously for 5 hours straight and I have produced 4 PowerPoint presentations taking a tour through Reading Exercises designed to help pupils practise their basic reading skills. My wrist hurts, my eyes are seeing text boxes where there really can't be text boxes and my kettle still hasn't rid itself of its newness.
I shall stop for today. It is 3.05 after all. I must boil the kettle one more time before I leave. Maybe on Monday, I'll finally be able to have a cup of tea. Oh, no, hang on, I'm not supposed to take a break in case someone thinks I'm bunking off this term. If only they knew. If only they knew.
I shall stop for today. It is 3.05 after all. I must boil the kettle one more time before I leave. Maybe on Monday, I'll finally be able to have a cup of tea. Oh, no, hang on, I'm not supposed to take a break in case someone thinks I'm bunking off this term. If only they knew. If only they knew.
Friday, 9 September 2011
Day 5 - The Twilight Zone
Cue spooky Twilight Zone music, or Halloween theme, or the Amityville Horror theme. Any one would do.
I was asked to cover my first lesson today. In my old classroom. With my former Year 10 class.
I knew the layout of the room had been changed by the new teacher in my room. Still, it was jolly odd, teaching in a space that had been, for the last 3 years at least, so familiar to me.The tables were arranged so that there was very little room for manoeuvre and the teacher's desk was in a totally alien (to me, anyway) place. However, the pupils I would be supervising, and with any luck, teaching, were essentially the same. My last year's Year 10, now this year's Year 11. A little bit older, and perhaps a little bit wiser? They were friendly and enthusiastic and keen to get on. Pleased that I was teaching them; eager to know whether I would be teaching them every Friday - but I had to put them straight. They took it well. There were no disparaging comments about their new teacher. I have taught them good manners at least!
Work I had begun with them last year was carrying on, albeit with a different approach. All I had to do was implement the new teacher's instructions. Easy enough. They responded well, with sensible contributions and a dedication which I know they learnt last year during the course of my lessons. When I took them on, they were a rowdy, disaffected, rude rabble and we worked hard together to ensure that the expectations of good manners, self-control and concentration were met.
Consequently, I realise I will miss this particular class when I leave. I will miss only one other class as a whole. Individual pupils will be missed too, but only two whole classes have won a place in my affections.
But however pleased I was to be teaching a familiar class in a familiar room with familiar work - I was still glad when the buzzer sounded and I could get back to the task I was set yesterday. There's a little devil on my shoulder and she's getting ready to poke me with her fork...
Continue your chosen Horror music till fade....
I was asked to cover my first lesson today. In my old classroom. With my former Year 10 class.
I knew the layout of the room had been changed by the new teacher in my room. Still, it was jolly odd, teaching in a space that had been, for the last 3 years at least, so familiar to me.The tables were arranged so that there was very little room for manoeuvre and the teacher's desk was in a totally alien (to me, anyway) place. However, the pupils I would be supervising, and with any luck, teaching, were essentially the same. My last year's Year 10, now this year's Year 11. A little bit older, and perhaps a little bit wiser? They were friendly and enthusiastic and keen to get on. Pleased that I was teaching them; eager to know whether I would be teaching them every Friday - but I had to put them straight. They took it well. There were no disparaging comments about their new teacher. I have taught them good manners at least!
Work I had begun with them last year was carrying on, albeit with a different approach. All I had to do was implement the new teacher's instructions. Easy enough. They responded well, with sensible contributions and a dedication which I know they learnt last year during the course of my lessons. When I took them on, they were a rowdy, disaffected, rude rabble and we worked hard together to ensure that the expectations of good manners, self-control and concentration were met.
Consequently, I realise I will miss this particular class when I leave. I will miss only one other class as a whole. Individual pupils will be missed too, but only two whole classes have won a place in my affections.
But however pleased I was to be teaching a familiar class in a familiar room with familiar work - I was still glad when the buzzer sounded and I could get back to the task I was set yesterday. There's a little devil on my shoulder and she's getting ready to poke me with her fork...
Continue your chosen Horror music till fade....
Thursday, 8 September 2011
Day 4 - Something to do
"Can you do me a favour?"
The magic words! At last, someone needs me to do something! After 4 days of lurking in a room which is not my own, I have Something to Do! Now I don't have to shy away from the accusatory glances of my former peers as I try to justify my existence with the unspoken lament None of this is my fault!
I was to fill in an order form. A list of numbers, codes, prices and descriptions of border colours. Imagine my excitement.
Then, my cup overflowed as I was handed a pile of papers and asked to rewrite them so that they could be used to improve literacy in the school. I have been working solidly for two hours now. This is my break. My lucky break!
The magic words! At last, someone needs me to do something! After 4 days of lurking in a room which is not my own, I have Something to Do! Now I don't have to shy away from the accusatory glances of my former peers as I try to justify my existence with the unspoken lament None of this is my fault!
I was to fill in an order form. A list of numbers, codes, prices and descriptions of border colours. Imagine my excitement.
Then, my cup overflowed as I was handed a pile of papers and asked to rewrite them so that they could be used to improve literacy in the school. I have been working solidly for two hours now. This is my break. My lucky break!
Wednesday, 7 September 2011
Day 3 - The Timetable Takes Shape
This was supposed to be the perfect end to a fantastic career at a well-respected school. Instead, I am sitting in a room which has, over the years, become a dumping ground for OPC (Other People's Crap), wondering how on earth I managed to slide back down the ladder - again! I have filled two bins, wiped down every surface with industrial strength lemon zest antibacterial cloths and cleaned the small fridge that I found lurking under the teetering pile of the Class of 2003 ICT Coursework Portfolios. Ah well, at least there's somewhere to put my beetroot salad.
Today I have sorted out my timetable. 5 lessons supporting another member of my former department. At all other times, I will be covering teachers who are ill or away taking a course.
Now I will see how the other half lives...
Today I have sorted out my timetable. 5 lessons supporting another member of my former department. At all other times, I will be covering teachers who are ill or away taking a course.
Now I will see how the other half lives...
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